I try to do a lot of research about colitis. As someone having this condition, it is important to learn as much as I can. Also, I need to read and learn so I can write intelligible (okay, at least semi-intelligible) posts for this blog.
Some information is highly interesting. Some is highly boring. Every once in awhile, I read something and think, "You have got to be kidding!" When that happens, most of the time I just shake my head and continue on.
But sometimes I read something that is absolutely astonishing. (It does provide material for my blog.)
I've been doing colitis research for about a year and a half. But for the last few months, in articles, on forums and other discussion groups, I keep running across a common theme:
"I failed my medication," "I failed this med," "I failed that med."
Excuse me???
I have no idea where this came from, the idea that if a medication doesn't work, WE failed the medication. I don't know whether it is a new way of describing medications not working or whether it's been out there awhile and I'm just now hearing about it. Regardless . . .
. . . it is wrong. Straight out wrong.
We know that medications work differently for different people. One medication may work like a miracle for one person, but for another, be a complete disaster. I understand the frustration when others have wonderful results with a popular, affordable medication, but all it does for you is cause unpleasant and sometimes debilitating side-effects (sulfasalazine, I'm looking at you), or just plain doesn't work at all.
If the medication works for other people, but not for you, I can see how it might feel like your body "failed."
But that is not the case.
It just means that your body, your condition, is operating differently. This is not a big surprise. There are billions of us on this planet; those building blocks that comprise each of us are both universal and very specifically unique. All of our bodies cannot possibly react the same to anything, let alone medication.
"But such and such medications work so well for so many people!" you say. Yes, but remember, there's probably something, medicine or otherwise, that works for you but not others.
I've written on this blog how I've gone through several medications trying to find one that will put me in remission and hopefully keep me there. Never have I said I failed those medications. My response has been, well, I tried medicine number four, and it didn't work. It didn't work. It, or in other words, the medication, didn't work. Moving on to number five!
When you have a chronic disease, there is a lot of talk about attitude . . . the thoughts you think, your "self-talk;" your outlook on your condition and on life; your hopes and your despairs; the value of a positive mindset as often as you can . . .
How in the world does saying (or even thinking) that WE failed our medications fit into that narrative???
It doesn't. If anything, it tears it down.
I've had multiple medications not work. It's not the medications' fault, it's not my fault. It's just the way my body works. Kind of like being afflicted with an autoimmune disease in the first place.
I didn't fail my medications. You didn't fail your medications! The medications just didn't work or they stopped working.
Please, can we remove the word "fail" from our chronic disease vocabulary? There are more worthy words for our circumstances . . . persevere, strive, endeavor, flourish, moving on, and of course, hope. Always hope!
© Colitis Senioritis 2023
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