A Change in Perspective: What is a Healing Person?

I read an interesting article titled, "I'm Sick With Alice in Wonderland Syndrome." The article is about Etta who was bedridden for two years with a condition that left her feeling like she was "floating" outside of her body, "unable to even shower." The article states, "According to Healthline, people with the syndrome may feel larger or smaller than they actually are and also find that the room they’re in . . . seems to shift and feel further or closer than it really is, much like the classic Lewis Carroll character, Alice."

The rest of the article talks about Etta's long diagnosis journey and her efforts to process and manage her condition. But at the end of the article, she says, "I had to relearn how I thought about my disease and how I approached it to be able to heal. It took a tremendous amount of work . . . I had to think of myself as a healing person, not a sick person.”

I understand that we who have Crohn's or ulcerative colitis cannot be cured. Nevertheless, that statement really struck me. 

What is a healing person? What does "healing" mean for someone with a chronic condition that currently has no cure? If you can't be cured does that mean "healing" doesn't apply to you? 

When I think of the word "healing," I feel warmth, light, hope, and purpose. When I think of the word "sick," I feel coldness, darkness, despair, and loss. I realized that as long as I thought of myself as a sick person (which is what I was doing), I was leaving myself susceptible to those negative feelings. But after reading that article, I purposely started to think of myself as a "healing" person, living in the warmth, light, hope, and purpose of my life, not in the despair and darkness of my disease.

It has made all the difference.

Attitude! Perspective! I am a HEALING person! Even if my body can't be healed right now!

On my "Life Takes Guts - Unfortunately" page, I wrote, " . . . wishing and hoping and “happy” thoughts will not keep UC at bay." That is absolutely true. However, our negative thoughts will sabotage and impair our abilities to get through the bad flares, and perhaps more significantly, thwart our efforts to delight in the good times.  

The article ends with Etta saying, "My biggest hope for the future of course is to find a cure. Now that I have hit rock bottom with my health and recovered to where I am now, I have so much hope.”

HEALING and HOPE. Words to live by!

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 © Colitis Senioritis 2022

Update September 2022: Prednisone Prevails! (and some insomnia)

I'm still feeling pretty good. I've now been back on the prednisone for almost three weeks. I've been on 10 mg a day, one pill, for five days. My stool has still not returned to its fully solid form and is at a 4.6 on the Bristol Stool Chart. But everything else is great. I've been able to do a few more mile walks with my spouse and dog. I'm feeling well enough to start getting some much needed things done, like clean up the pantry (so we can actually walk into it) and clean out a closet.

And I've ate salad . . . big salad, with spinach, butter lettuce, a few cherry tomatoes, garbanzo beans, cheddar cheese, and croutons . . . twice in the last two weeks and have not had any adverse affects.

I am having some light bouts of insomnia, which I've never had before. I've always had the rare occasion where I lay in bed awake for several hours, but usually even then I could get at least four or five hours sleep. This is different. I sleep for a few hours, wake up and my mind starts going crazy (or my leg muscles start aching for some reason) and that is that. Or, I did have one night where I lay in bed wide-awake for a few hours, arose thinking it would be for thirty minutes or an hour and ended being up the entire night. It is weird to hear the roosters go off when you haven't slept at all. (I am writing this at four o'clock in the morning.) So far, the insomnia only lasts a day or two and then I'm okay for awhile.

I'm assuming the insomnia is a side-effect of the prednisone. When I was on the higher dose, I would occasionally have trouble falling asleep, but that was all. Perhaps I've been taking prednisone long enough that it is starting to build up in my body. I haven't researched yet whether that is possible. I have been diligent about making sure I properly taper off of the prednisone the three times I've tried to go off of it. And I did go seven weeks without it before I had to jump on it again. I would have thought that would have given my body plenty of time to get it out of my system.

Anyway, my next follow-up doctor's appointment is in two weeks. So much to talk about at that appointment! 

Next Update: October, 2022, The Search For Intelligent Medicine in the Universe Continues!

Previous Update: August, 2022, Uh oh . . . This Isn't Good

 

 © Colitis Senioritis 2022